I decided to go off-roading with this Healthy Narcissism Month post so put your seatbelt on.
It’s time to apologize for being so awesome.
That’s right. Being the phenomenal person that you are requires that you open up your metaphorical wallet and pay up in the form of a huge apology.
I mean it. Give all you have right now. Even if it’s just a crumpled up dollar bill of an apology.
Find someone to give it to. It’s a bonus if you choose someone in your life who consistently marvels at your greatness or stands behind you to help you be the star you are. Or you can let it be a stranger, someone who you meet on the path of life who could use a little boost.
In order to maintain your amazingness, you must pay your debt.
How should you pay? By credit card? No. Paypal? Nope. Do it like this…
First, apologize immediately for your coolness, your class, your distracting beauty, or whatever it is that either imagine people see in you or you know to be true.
Just start by saying, “I’m sorry, but..”
Then, let someone else know how wonderful they are. Reflect back to them what they either do or don’t see in themselves.
You and the person who is about to receive your apology both have a unique brand of awesome.
Show them that you’re fully aware of their brand.
Maybe they’re in denial about their awesomeness or they don’t have enough life experience and self-awareness to embrace it as a personal truth.
Therefore, it’s your job to enlighten them.
So say to the friendly cashier at Trader Joes, “I’m sorry but…you seem very good at what you do. I would lose money for the company if i had to operate a cash register.”
Randomly say to a friend who is self-conscious about her looks, “I’m sorry but…wow, you look awesome today (and always).”
A major difference between a healthy narcissist and an unhealthy narcissist is just this — the ability to share the greatness, to have an investment in the well-being of the people who love you most, as well as strangers and everyone in between.
The healthy narcissist says to himself or herself, “People have already seen my brand of awesome. Now it’s time to make someone else feel awesome, which will make me feel even more awesome in the long run.”
The unhealthy narcissist says to himself or herself, “They don’t deserve my compliment. What have they done for me? I still need someone to tell me I’m great first, and then maaaaaybe I’ll pay a compliment.”
It’s your job to share the spotlight and celebrate the good in people and don’t let the spotlight shine on you in this moment.
Stay on them. Reinforce how wonderful they are.
After all, you know you’re awesome so why do you need to hear it again?
The advanced version of healthy narcissism would be to realize that your happiness and self-worth is actually tied into spreading love to the world, especially people who care about you and support you.
So get out there and start apologizing.